What a monk can teach us about tigers

Hello Gorgeous,

 

Today I’m going to tell you an old teaching story that I love, and have said to my classes many times over the years and the message always serves as a good reminder.

It starts with a monk in India…

This monk was a very happy monk. He noticed how the world generally took care of itself.

He believed that everything happened for a reason and things would always work out the way they were supposed to.

He would notice his philosophy in action, smile, and nod his head wisely as it confirmed his trust in letting things be as they are.

Then monk traveled to a hermitage for a month. As he unpacked his few belongings, he looked out the window and the scene caught his attention.

He saw an injured deer limping into the clearing followed by a tiger.

He held his breath as he waited to see what would happen.

The deer laid down in the clearing, completely surrendering to the tiger.

Then the tiger sat down, and watched over the injured deer for the whole night.

In the morning, the deer was healed and they went their separate ways.

The monk smiled, and nodded. Yes, everything happens for a reason, and everything works out exactly how it should in the end.

The next evening there was a wild thunderstorm.

The night sky was lit up with lightning and the thunder roared over the thatched huts of the hermitage.

As the monk watched the storm from his window, he saw one of the huts was hit by lightning and lit up on fire.

The monk continued to watch the action, waiting to see what would happen, knowing that all would be fine in the end.

He continued to watch as the fire jumped from roof to roof, and eventually burning down the hermitage.

As he was running from his own hut to safety, he saw the abbess of the hermitage.

The abbess asked him: Did you see how this fire started?

He said, “Yes, lightning hit one of the huts.” He then continued to explain wisely about the deer and the tiger and how everything is meant to be and it all will work out in the end.

The abbess exclaimed, “You fool! There is a time to be a deer, but there is also a time when you need to stand up and be the tiger who watches over the deer!

However, for some of us it’s easier stand by and watch, blame our circumstances on something else, or continue to wait until the “right” time to take action.

The tiger represents action and courage, and one of my favorite definitions of courage is this:

To sense what truly matters in life and live from that place.

This is what I love, and so many women love, about the Soul Strategy Sessions because it is all about taking action in your life.

No more wondering what your purpose is, or how to make your life more meaningful.

“Tina’s Soul Strategy Sessions helped me take action in my life and increase my vision for what I want my life to be. I have found renewed direction and certainty and have seen some exciting opportunities take shape as I have worked my soul map. Soul Strategy Sessions, for me, have been a great catalyst for change and personal growth. Highly recommend.” – Lia Skaar

No more waiting on the sidelines of your life as you watch another year go by.

“Implementing Tina’s techniques throughout the 8 week strategy session has resulted in positive and healthy changes in my life.  Tina’s coaching gave me the tools to turn thoughts into action.  I look forward to more of Tina’s coaching in the future.” – Lucinda Taylor, B.Sc, Information Technology

No more uncertainty and feeling like you’re the only one going through this.

“If you aren’t prepared to know who you are, what you stand for and how to start living more authentically don’t sign up for the Soul Strategy Sessions. Tina has a unique gift of bringing out concepts and thoughts right at the time you are ready to receive and action them. She creates an environment that allows people to workshop their path and spit ball ideas. It is truly beautiful, watching strangers transform into close, non-judgemental confidantes over 8 weeks.” – Jill, Provincial Government

You will feel happier, more focused, and more powerful in your life.

“Soul strategies for me was about the building of a safe and supportive community of woman so we could explore the issues that hold us back from being the successful and the confident women we can be. Because of this community, I was able to face my fears, challenge my limited thinking as well as my behaviors that do not help me attain my goals in life. I have found my inner power through the encouragement and compassion from Tina and the wonderful women that I journeyed with during this session. When we find our inner power we truly ROCK as women.” – Suzanne Hehn–Social Worker

Being the deer can feel more natural for some of us. It might feel easier to wait for the next opportunity, better timing, or when we feel like we’re in a “better” space.

Being the tiger can feel riskier, messier and even…dare I say: uncomfortable?

Yet everything we want lies on the other side of fear and resistance.

Yes, it takes some courage, and I know you have it in you.

There is a time to be a deer, and this is your time, and your LAST time (with me anyways) to really jump in and start creating your life based on what is important to you.

Next session will begin early 2016. 

I’d love to hear from you now! Do you want to share with me a story of when you were a tiger? You can share either in the Soul Sisterhood Facebook Group, or in the comments below.

If you liked this post, then please share it with all your friends on Facebook, Tweet it out loud, and forward it to your loved ones. We can be the light for each other.

#daretobeyou

Love and Light,
t

Top 20ish rules to live by.

Hello Gorgeous,

Last week was a whirlwind.

Dave’s family had three birthdays and two anniversaries last week, PLUS we worked on the basement most of the weekend. I’m getting super sick of working on that damn thing I have to say, but we are soooo close now to being finished that I can finally see the end is near.

THANK. YOU. GOD!

I won’t keep you in suspense any longer about the top 20ish list though, so here it is:

  1. Don’t wait for permission before you act, or it may never come.
  2. Choose to see the light in others, and they will start to see it in themselves.
  3. Approach your life as though it matters, and it will.
  4. You are one of the few creatures in the whole world that can change their world simply by their will. Don’t forget that.
  5. You may never be totally free of fear, but you will always have enough strength to go through it.
  6. You were born already whole. There is nothing you need to do or get to earn it, it’s a done deal.
  7. It’s okay not to know. You don’t have to decide right now.
  8. There is a reason why you love what you love. If you follow it, you will always live with passion and sparkle.
  9. The greatest gift you can give another human being is to make them feel safe.
  10. Doubt is a natural part of the creative process. Keep going.
  11. The greatest gift you can give to another human being is to accept them exactly as they are.
  12. It doesn’t matter how long the dark has been there, once the light is on, it’s on.
  13. Your life is your message, make your choices count.
  14. Sitting for a few minutes quietly every day will change your life.
  15. Surround yourself with people you want to be like, because you become who you hang out with.
  16. Give freely and generously without expectation and it will feel like giving blessings. If you can’t, then don’t.
  17. Never forget that the BIG questions are not only your questions, they are OUR questions. They are humanity’s questions, we’re all trying to figure this thing out.
  18. You don’t need to know it all to start. The path is created by walking it.
  19. Forgive yourself a lot and apologize if you hurt someone. Making mistakes is a part of learning.
  20. It’s not our job to save each other, it’s our job to love each other as we awaken ourselves.
  21. Listen for life’s sweetness.
  22. You belong, you matter, and you are loved.

I’d love to hear what you’d add to the list! What’s do you live by, and what’s most important to you? Share it in the comments below, or feel free to join the conversation in the Soul Sisterhood and tell me what you’d add.

Did you like this post? Then please spread the love and share with your friends on Facebook, Tweet it out loud, and forward to someone you love by clicking one of the buttons below.

Until next week, my friend…

#Daretobeyou

Love and Light,

t

When everyone has an opinion, how do you decide among all the noise?

Hello Gorgeous,

This morning as I was running I was thinking a lot about why we don’t go after what we really want, or why we often say that we don’t know what we want.

Since I broke the news of our pregnancy, I’ve been getting a TONNE of advice.

Some solicited, and much of it unsolicited advice.

I’m an older mommy so I’m one of the last of my friends and peers to have a child and I regularly see my feeds plastered with mommy blogs, parenting advice, and people sharing their challenges.

There is a lot of noise when it comes to parenting because everyone seems to have an opinion.

In the weeks leading up to our 20 week ultrasound, I got a lot very strong opinions on if we should find out the sex or not.

We had decided early on that we wanted to know the sex if we could, and are proud to say that last week we found out that we are going to be the proud parents of a little BOY!

But it’s not just parenting, people have opinions on everything: what you should eat, what’s healthy, how you should exercise, the best kind of yoga, how to find a partner, what you should wear, how to have good relationships, a good sex life, how you should think, and really everything you should, or even could do. Right?

With so much noise out there in every aspect of our lives, how does one navigate the waters, especially when everyone seems to have an opinion, and often a REALLY strong opinion?

Read on my friend…

Do you know what do you want?

Aaaaaand HOW do you really know what you want?

Have you ever made a decision because you knew someone expected you to do it?

Whether it’s what to major in school, or what jobs to apply for? How did that make you feel, and looking back, how happy are you with that decision now?

Have you ever agonized over what to do because you knew deep down what you wanted, but felt you needed to ask everyone else first to validate your choice?

Did that empower you, or disempower you?

Have you ever purchased something at the store because the sales help were oohing and ahhing at how great you looked in it, even though you didn’t feel it was quite right?

Then once you got it home asked yourself: what was I thinking?

Or here’s a big one: when you look back on your life now, are there things you wish you hadn’t done but did anyways because others expected you too, or encouraged you too?

We are so easily influenced by each other because we are mammals which are emotionally driven creatures.

We are naturally tribal creatures who depend on each other for our well being and there is no worse punishment for us than not belonging.

We will do almost anything to be accepted.

There’s a reason Time Outs are so effective for disciplining children. Or if you have ever trained a dog, turning your back to them will stop an undesirable behavior. There is nothing more painful than not belonging to us and we will correct our behavior to be in good graces once again.

So, what about the big stuff, like your own hearts desires? Your right path? How do you make those choices without being drowned out by all the noise of what other’s want you to do?

Here are 3 things you need to know about how to deal with the noise around you:

1) Other peoples advice is a gift…and I’ll tell you why.

When people offer you advice (solicited or not), they are sharing something important and personal about themselves with you. They are sharing their model of the world, and what is important to THEM. It is not about you. If you can look at it from this perspective it’s easier to not get charged or influenced by the advice offered. Most often advice is well meaning, and is based on THEIR personal experience from their life’s history. It has nothing to do with what is right for you and your life’s circumstances, even if you decide to consider it when it aligns with your own beliefs.

2) If you don’t know about something, it’s useful to research it.

I often ask people I respect for their opinions and advice on things I know nothing about. Choose to ask with the intention of collecting information to understand the topic better and have more data to make a decision that fits with your life. I want to be clear, that this is different than asking what to DO, it is asking for the sake of collecting information only, not to influence what is inherently your decision to make.

3) Follow your inner compass.

There is a part of you that already knows the answers because everyone of your resources are within. Your life will not be answered by more money, status, or stuff. You already know this. This is the hardest one of all because it is entirely internal and it takes a lot of trust to follow through with choices that may be unpopular even when you know it is the right thing for you.

It takes courage and confidence to live authentically.

It’s not always easy or comfortable to stand in your truth and not to be drowned by the noise of expectation and the wants of everyone around you. It’s so natural for so many of us to want to be, and try to be, all things to all people….and it’s impossible and exhausting.

“The Soul Strategy Sessions have empowered me to pursue my goals with focus and confidence. With the support of your soul sisters and Tina’s guidance and teaching you are able to uncover a clear path to success and live life to the fullest.” –Carly Graham, Graduate Student

You can start living more authentically now.

“Soul strategies for me was about the building of a safe and supportive community of woman so we could explore the issues that hold us back from being the successful and the confident women we can be. Because of this community, I was able to face my fears, challenge my limited thinking as well as my behaviors that do not help me attain my goals in life. I have found my inner power through the encouragement and compassion from Tina and the wonderful women that I journeyed with during this session. When we find our inner power we truly ROCK as women.” – Suzanne Hehn–Social Worker

The Soul Strategy Sessions offers tools to get clear on your inner compass and is the basis of how to live a more meaningful and happier life. This is the last Soul Strategy Session for 2015, and possibly ever, I’d love for you to join us. Read more about it here.

I sure hope I get to see you there!

Thank you for being the light that you are.

#daretobeyou

Love and Light,

t

What’s your REAL dream life?

Hi Gorgeous,

What’s your dream life?

If you are planning on hiring a coach (or mentor for that matter), it’s recommended that you hire someone who’s already at where you want to be.

Everyone (at least in my coaching world) talk about 2 things that they are constantly trying to sell you:

  • Your dream life.
  • Creating a 6 figure business.

They are often sold with images of a luxurious lifestyle that include a LOT of money, plenty of travel, and a laptop lifestyle.

My problem with that, is that often these “dreams” are contingent on externals and having the “right” things, and THEN finally you can be happy.

I call bullshit.

Not only that, but most of these coaches that I know work 80 hour weeks and have a large support team to pay for so they only take home a fraction of what they say they do. Don’t even get me started on the happiness part of it, because I don’t see a lot of balance there.

I’ve been doing this work for 8 years, and never, and I mean NEVER have I had a client become happier once they got more stuff, better stuff, or more money.

Where I HAVE seen clients become happier is when they stopped looking at what they were missing, and started looking inside at what makes them feel happy and fulfilled and did more of that.

(If you haven’t done the Clarity Crash Course, Click her to get this great FREE resource to help you get clear on what actually makes you happy, and it doesn’t have anything to do with a new Marc Jacobs bag.)

Happiness is what we are all after when we are dreaming about our dream life. We want to feel inspired, content, at ease, confident, and like we are making a difference.

The problem is that happiness can’t be accomplished through stuff, or getting “somewhere” in life.

In fact, it’s the opposite.

Happiness comes from the inside out.

Looking to externals is looking to the outside to fill the inside, and it just doesn’t work. We’ve all tried it, and we don’t need to go there.

Happiness comes from what we give, not what we get.

Last night I completed a powerful group coaching session with women that I love and genuinely care for, had a cuddle with my sweet dog, and while I was brushing my teeth I could hear my wonderful husband downstairs working on renovations.

It was then that I had an insight that kind of rocked me: I was living my dream.

No, it’s not a 6 figure business that has me travelling glamorously around the world while I sipped expensive wine.

It’s not a high status job that has a tonne of people working under me.

It’s also not fancy, with luxurious stuff.

But it is MY dream, and absolutely my version of success.

I am blessed to have found and married the greatest man I have ever known. I adore, admire, and am truly crazy about him. He is more than everything I could have hoped for, and the best part is: he loves me just as much back and now we’re starting our family together.

I feel like I make a meaningful difference for people every day so my heart overflows and I go to bed every night feeling blessed.

I love my career so much that it rarely feels like work and it consistently inspires and delights me…aaand pinch me: I get paid to do it.

I have time to do things that are important to me, like spending time with friends, reading books, fitness, yoga, meditation, and learning about anything that peaks my curiosity.

I am 100% authentic every single day. What you see is what you get and I never try to be someone else for anybody.

I live aligned with my values and what’s most important to me. I never compromise and never feel I have to.

My life is balanced with healthy boundaries and I am truly joyful.

I do what I want. This is HUGE for me!

I understand and love myself unconditionally and wholly. I am on my own side and am a great cheerleader for myself.

Every day I feel like I have meaningful interactions with people. Whether it’s with friends and family, my clients, or the server, I feel connected.

I remember daily, that I am also connected to something greater and that it is my privilege to serve others because we are all one and the same.

Is it glamorous? Probably not.

Am I so happy that I have a shit eating grin every night that I go to bed?

Absolutely. I feel like I’ve won.

Why do I share all this with you? It’s not to boast about how awesome my life is (although if you want to tell me that I won’t argue with you), but it’s to give you another perspective of success.

Is success really about having the right title, the right bank statement, or the right stuff?

Some people will tell you that. Go ahead and try it, I haven’t met a person yet who achieved happiness that way.

I’m going to ask you to go deeper.

When you really think about what a perfect day would look like to you, what comes up for you? Who would be there? What would you be doing? How would you be feeling? What values are being honored there?

THIS is where you access your key to happiness. This is how you start to work from the inside out.

So, I want to hear from you: tell me about your perfect day and what about it is different than your current life? Then share with me one thing that you are going to do to move towards it below or in the Soul Sisterhood (click here to join us!)

Before I go, I have a few other quick things you might be interested in:

FREE Webinar for Anxiety Wednesday June 24th 7pm. Click here to register. 

The Soul-O-Preneur Course is up for sale for only $47. Click to learn more.

The LAST Soul Strategy Sessions of 2015 is open for registration: Tuesdays August 4th to September 22nd, 5:30 – 7pm. Click to learn more before it’s sold out!

Thank you for being the incredible light that you are! Keep shining and #daretobeyou.

Love and Light,

t

How to find your direction when you’re stuck.

Hello Gorgeous,

I hope you enjoyed some sunshine this last weekend and had a chance to do something fun for yourself.

I’m officially 18 weeks prego yesterday and am finally starting to gain some energy back to move my body and get outside. Hooray! Damn it feels good to get out and MOVE again!

Since I’ve announced my pregnancy, I’ve got a LOT of responses…thank you so much, you sure know how to make a gal feel loved! Making a baby is a miraculous and scary thing and I’m so over-the-moon thrilled to have your support.

Last week was also the beginning of the Summer Soul Strategy Sessions, and wow, we have an incredible group of women once again! They have inspired this post, so thank you beautiful ladies.

One thing I heard over and over again last week was regarding direction and feeling stuck.

This post isn’t going to be about the whole process of finding direction and clarity, you can do that in my free Clarity Crash Course, but it is about the next most important step:

Action.

How many of us believe the answers lie outside of ourselves?

We get another book, take another course, watch another webinar, or some other self-improvement nonsense?

Don’t feel bad, I’ve done it too.

We all do, and when we’re stuck we’re ready to do just about anything to get unstuck…except get moving.

It’s easier to hope some guru has the magic answer of what to do with your life and then follow their step by step process to “live-your-dream-life-where-nothing-bad-will-ever-happen-ever-again-because-there’s-a-picture-of-a-young-beautiful-woman-smiling-with-her-arms-spread-wide-in-a-field-with-beams-of-sunshine.”

But it’s a crock.

You are a unique special individual and there has only ever been one of you in all of time.

So, how could a one-size-fits-all solution possibly work?

Direction is a verb that’s done by taking action.

Where we often get stuck, is we believe that there IS a singular solution and our job is to figure out what that ONE way is to be happy.

It sounds a lot like perfection doesn’t it? The belief that there is one perfect way only and you have to keep striving until you find it even though it doesn’t even exist.

It’s kind of crazy.

It would be a very sad joke from the universe if we were born with one shot at a short little life to go after our one possibility of happiness or it was all wasted.

The truth is there are many wonderful and fulfilling directions any of us could take that would lead to happiness and contentment.

You will find which ones resonate with you but getting out there and DOING stuff, not PLANNING to do stuff.

We don’t even know what makes us happy in the first place until we’ve done it.

If there’s one general statement I can say about finding your direction it’s this:

Chase your happiness.

Happiness will lead you to your passions and your purpose.

Chasing it means that you are actively taking action and moving in that direction.

There is no one right direction, no matter what Kool-Aid someone is trying to sell you. That’s just based on scarcity and fear, and we already have enough of that.

So here’s my challenge for you:

Tell me what makes you truly happy, and share with me what 3 things you are going to do to fulfill that happiness either below in the comments, or in the Soul Sisterhood Facebook group.

*Don’t forget to schedule that shit in, or it won’t happen, and why wait another week, year, or decade? Do it now.

So, I want to hear from you now! Do you know your direction? Do you even believe in a direction? Or do you just want to talk more about my pregnancy? That’s cool too! Tell me all about it below.

Make today a good one, and don’t forget to #daretobeyou!

Love and Light,

t

What do handstands and qualifications have to do with each other?

As a yoga teacher, I will often throw in challenging poses like handstands that I know are going to be too difficult for most of the people to master easily.

No, not because I’m mean and I want to see them fail, but because I think it’s good to get used to the feel and prep of harder poses so eventually they will be able to do them.

Almost every time though, there’s a few students who sit on the floor and just watch no matter how many beginner steps I give them.

They sit there contentedly smiling and cheering students on who are trying and failing, but never actually attempting it themselves, believing it’s not for them.

I believe that to grow we must be willing to try things that challenge us and see what we can do even if we suck at it, and yoga is no exception.

So when I ask the students on the floor why aren’t they trying, it’s rarely because of an injury, it’s because they believe they aren’t qualified yet.

These are the most common excuses I hear:

I’m not strong enough yet.

I don’t think I can do it.

I’m not ready to try it yet.

I’m scared.

No shit, so is everyone else.

But instead of even testing to see if they can, they wait on the sidelines until they’re going to feeeeel ready for it.

Here’s the thing, we will never feel ready or qualified enough for the things life throws at us.

Ready is a myth, and a shitty excuse for not participating in your life.

I am also willing to bet my car (don’t be too excited, it’s not that awesome) that these same people live their whole lives sitting on the sidelines waiting, and we are all the person at different times in our lives.

We watch opportunities slip through our fingers to protect ourselves so we don’t have to be uncomfortable or get hurt.

But then we never fully engage with life, and will be left with regret and a whole pile of should haves.

We want our dream vacation to be perfect so we put it off until all the details are just right and everything is all figured out and it may be YEARS before that happens. But at least it will be perfect, right?

We put off sharing our skills until we hone them to perfection so we don’t make a mistake so no one finds out that we don’t actually know enough and don’t really deserve to be doing it.

We don’t take the first steps in building a business because we need to get the right website up first even though we don’t know what that would be but at least it would make us look like we know what we’re doing.

We don’t take the training we want because we don’t know enough first and are afraid of looking stupid in front of others believing of course everyone else would know more than us.

We want to say no, but not yet, because even though we’re exhausted and spread way too thing already, we don’t want to burn any bridges or piss anyone off.

We don’t start working out because we don’t know what we’re doing and certainly don’t want everyone else to know that we’re new at this.

We don’t go for the promotion because we don’t have 100% percent of the skills yet so there’s no point even trying.

The deepest learning from life is not from a book explaining theory, it’s from jumping in and figuring shit out.

You don’t have to do this recklessly, but it does mean getting your hands dirty, understanding that failure is not a character flaw, and being a little vulnerable.

Aaand the rewards? Emotional resilience (one of the markers for happiness), confidence (which can only be attained by doing things that are hard), and acquiring abilities faster than your peers (you will be ahead of the game).

You are not put on this earth to make people like you, or even to not look stupid, you are here to make a dent in the universe and its impossible watching from the sidelines.

Go on, jump in and see what you can do!

I want to hear from you now. Do you like handstands, and what did it take for you to try it? What have you done that was hard, but you jumped in anyways? Where have you been waiting in your life until you were “ready”? Tell me all about it below!

Dare to be you.

Love and Light,

t

A simple tweak that changes everything

Hello Gorgeous,

One thing I read everywhere these days is why mindsets are important and rightfully so.

A mindset is your attitude, or inclination towards something. It shapes your beliefs of what is possible and how you will respond through your behavior.

As an entrepreneur, the popular one in my circles is money mindsets, and eeeeeeeveryone is trying to sell entrepreneurs a positive money mindset as a way to make more money.

A poor money mindset for entrepreneurs shatters their confidence, limits their earning potential, and eventually will lead to burn out.

A positive money mindset creates possibility, action, and limitless earning potential.

The customer also benefits by often getting better service and products from someone who is excited and feels fresh about their work.

However, you don’t have to be an entrepreneur to have mindsets.

Mindsets are alive in everything we think and do.

The most common complaints I hear from women is that they feel overwhelmed, suffer from anxiety, and feel like they are treading water.

In the Soul Strategy Sessions we start early with mindset because this is one of the most powerful agents of change.

Everything begins with your thoughts.

Watch your thoughts; they become your words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become your character.
Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.
– Lao Tzu

Try this:

Right now grab a pen and paper and write down your biggest complaint about your life. Then write down what have you been believing about this situation. (Do you feel it’s out of your hands? Is it up to someone else? Are you worried about how others will see you? Is it too late? Are you waiting for something?) Then ask yourself: Is this actually true? If not, you’ve unmasked one of your beliefs that is contributing to your complaint. If you believe it to be true, what is in your power to begin to change your situation now? 

Once you complete this, tell me about what you discovered in the comments below.

Creating the right mindset puts you in control of your destiny which is empowering, exhilarating, and anything becomes possible.

It’s a simple tweak, and it is life altering.

This is why entrepreneurs can spend thousands of dollars to shift from a scarcity mindset to a more lucrative money mindset. It can be the difference between struggling to bring in cash to making tens of thousands aaaaaand having the life they want in the process.

If you’re treading water, it’s the difference of years of anxiety to becoming powerful and confident in your life.

With the right mindset:

You will be more confident in who you are, your choices, and your direction.

You will see yourself and your life more powerfully.

You will get into action with more ease to create the life you want. 

That’s huge, and the results are yours forever.

There’s only two weeks left before the next round of Soul Strategy begins and it’s filling up fast.

I love hearing from you, so go ahead and email me for more information or check out my website to learn more and register. 

If you know of a fabulous gal who needs to know about this, please forward this to them or share on social media by clicking the buttons below. 

I hope you are enjoying an incredible long weekend and I look forward to hearing from you soon!

Dare to be you. 

Love and Light,
t

rock bottom as a path to your light

Hello Gorgeous,

Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life. – J.K. Rowling

I saw this quote this morning and it spoke to me in a way I had to speak to you.

Rock bottom is the most uncomfortable place to be.

It’s dark and illuminates that darkest parts of ourselves: fear, loneliness, exhaustion and everything we don’t want to feel.

And yet…

At the bottom, comes a profound insight that has the power to transform your life.

For me, it was a realization in my darkest moments that no one can save me but me.

I knew in my bones that if I continued the way I was going I would end up with a life I did not want and become unrecognizable to myself.

So I, like many others, began at rock bottom with a choice that often starts with “no more” or “never again.”

Whether it’s leaving a bad relationship, kicking an addiction, quitting a job that sucks your soul, getting off a path that is harming you, or the decision to stop making yourself the enemy: it stars with a definitive decision.

This decision becomes your conviction and guiding light out of the darkness and back to yourself.

It is a promise to yourself tattooed on your heart which becomes the defining moment shifting you from where you were to where you are going.

This single decision will begin the rebuild your life, redefine who you are, what you stand for, and will be one of the most powerful and potent moments of your life.

No one can save you but you because ultimately you have to do the grunt work to get the reward, and it doesn’t mean you have to be alone while you do it.

Finding a tribe of supportive women makes the journey easier, more fun, and of course more meaningful…after all, we learn through each other’s stories.

When you find support in women who are on the other side of where you are, they can become your mentors and teachers.

This makes the rebuilding process easier and faster than if you were doing it alone, and seriously: who wants to struggle longer?

If you are in the process of rebuilding, you have a place with me and a tribe of incredible women who genuinely want to see you succeed in the Soul Strategy Sessions.

“Intention is powerful but ACTION is life changing. Tina’s enthusiasm for life, for coaching and for everyone she meets is an inspiration. Soul Strategies has facilitated so much motivation and direction in my life. Big dreams… HUGE DREAMS, that some of us were too scared to admit even to ourselves before this process are now coming true. These sessions have taken me to a place of no limits. I will carry this with me wherever I go.”
-Tara Rossouw, Yoga Teacher

Through our 8 weeks together, you will gain clarity on what you truly want in your life, what is important to you and how to start living aligned with who you truly are.

Then I met Tina!  And the lights went on, my prayers had been answered.  She offered the guidance I had been asking for years.  She knew how to help me dig down into the mud and pull out the gems that were hiding there.  And instantly things began turning around for me.  Direction, calm, insight, and the achievement of goals I had begun to think was going to be impossible.  I have achieved more in these past few months than I could have imagined before Tina, and achieved them with peace and calm.  I am now on the road to a whole new life – the one I want! “-Daphne Murphy, Breast Cancer Survivor  

You will gain valuable tools to support your growth and increase your confidence.

“The Soul Strategy Sessions have empowered me to pursue my goals with focus and confidence. With the support of your soul sisters and Tina’s guidance and teaching you are able to uncover a clear path to success and live life to the fullest.” –Carly Graham, Graduate Student

You will see the best parts of you shine through and start to live more authentically.

After 8 weeks, I left a much happier and confident person with a greater sense of clarity with my future vision.  Alongside some great easy to use tricks to get through some of those tough long days.   I continue to use a lot of what I have learned and have had a lot of comments from co-workers and friends and family that noticed my transition. “ – Tami Mitchell, Access Communications

If you are ready to start living on purpose, and becoming the boss of your own life, the next session starts next week, click here for more details and registration.

If you are ready to start living on purpose, and becoming the boss of your own life, the next session starts next week, click here for more details and registration.

Even if you don’t join us in the Soul Strategy Sessions, click here to join us in the Soul Sisterhood a free group to support and inspire you to shine brighter. 

Dare to be you. 

In Love and Light,
t

How Oprah taught me integrity

Hello Gorgeous,

To be honest, I had a totally different post planned for today, but I’ve decided to postpone it for next week because it will follow this one beautifully anyways.

When we know better, we do better.

That is what Oprah said to me as a child watching her show and it changed my life.

In its simplicity, the above statement says something beautifully.

We don’t all know better.

When we do, it’s our responsibility to change our behavior. Ignorance no longer counts.

It inspired compassion in me for people who may not have the same skill set as I do, and gave me the seeds of personal responsibility defining what it meant to act with integrity.

It didn’t take me very long to cultivate the compassion part, but responsibility is still something I am constantly practicing and working to getting better at.

Here’s a few ways I practice Oprah’s words:

1) Everyone is doing the best they can with what they got.

This is probably something else I heard on Oprah and I absolutely believe this to be true. Not everyone has the same life skills, yet everyone is doing the best they can whether you understand it or not.  Be compassionate for people on their journey to do better, we are all walking the same path.

2) Eliminate try and maybe from your vocabulary.

You don’t try to sit down, right? You sit do or you don’t. Same thing with maybe. This type of language usually means no or that you don’t want to do it, so just be honest and say no. It will save you from the resistance and others from being disappointed.

3) The first time you do it it’s a mistake, the second time it’s a choice.

If you keep making the same mistake, and know it’s a mistake, it’s no longer a mistake, there is some part of you that is choosing it. If you are constantly late, not following through on what you say you’re going to do, saying yes to everyone and then feeling resentful about it, repeatedly staying too long in the wrong relationships, you are choosing this. You can choose differently.

I know, I know, I learned integrity from Oprah, what are you going to do about it?

I would love to hear from you!

What are your best tips to act with integrity? Did Oprah change your life too? What words of wisdom changed your life? I love hearing from you, please share in the comments below.

Thank you for letting me into your life and your inbox, I am so grateful to have you in my life!

Share the light lovely: share this on Facebook, Tweet it out loud, and forward this to all of your friends. We are beacons for each other.

Dare to be you. 

Love and Light,

t

should history define you?

Hello gorgeous,

How much stock do you put into your history? Does it define who you are, and does it have to?

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately…

We have the capacity to create anything we can imagine for our lives, completely transform the environments we live in, and recreate ourselves just by changing what we believe.

Yet…

Many of us choose our histories to define us.

Even getting one poor mark on a test score can define who we believe ourselves to be. Instead of believing we got one poor mark, it becomes: I’m not good at math. We make the score mean something about US.

The sad thing is once we internalize a belief, we make it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

On a bigger scale, it could be how you grew up, or a difficult event in your life that you may have allowed to define you.

My childhood was a messy one growing up in an alcoholic home.

It’s not unique, but it did happen and for a long time the challenges affected how I felt about myself, the choices I made, and the way I lived.

I decided relatively early to save myself and moved out of province to get space but also to create a new life and identity for myself.

My past followed me in my low self-esteem, tentativeness, and not feeling like I was good enough to even apply for the jobs I wanted or have the will to go for the kind of success I craved in life.

Yet there was always this quiet voice urging me on.

It had faith in me, confidence in the life I wanted, and was unshakable.

As long as I kept walking the path, I knew I would become who I wanted to be in the life I wanted to be living.

And here I am!

On the path to get here I have been many things: straight A student, child of an alcoholic, runner, failing student, victim, unreliable, wild child, ashamed, barista, waitress, bookkeeper, store manager, receptionist, party girl, girlfriend, inspired, straight A student again, yoga teacher, ambitious, creator, artist, generous, coach, wife, driven, writer, loving, speaker, yoga teacher trainer, trusting, thriver, boss lady, me.

The perspective that changed me was: life happens.

The events in my life were not good or bad, they are just what happened.

I have also developed a lot of compassion both for myself and others, and it has allowed me to keep getting up when I fall down, or try again if I make mistakes.

My power is in the knowing that my history is a part of my story, yet it does not have to define me or be the whole story.

I define me and I create my story.

I define myself by the choices I make and how I choose to show up in the world, and this is possible for you too.

It’s never too late to be who you might have been. – George Elliot

Here’s 3 steps to support you in becoming the woman you want to be:

1. Decide who you want to be from your highest self.

Make your life a choice, not a default to unskillful behavior patterns that have hardened into habit. Imagine how this woman behaves, the choices she makes, what matters to her, and then start doing what she does. Let her be your guide.

 2. Choose what you want your life to be about that’s bigger than what happened to you or the way you have been in the past.

I always knew that I wanted to make a difference and make this world a better, happier, and more loving place. This was the seed that has continued to bear fruit for years through inspiration, motivation, and courage to keep going.

3. Lastly, growing is uncomfortable, so surround yourself with loving people who understand and support you.

Click here and join us in the Lightmaker’s Mastermind community and get daily positive support and inspiration. We’d love to have you!

I’d love to hear from you now! Do you have a story of creating yourself or your life? Do you believe your history has defined you? Please share it in the comments below, I love hearing from you!

Did you like this post? Then please share it with all of your friends on Facebook, Tweet it out loud, and forward it to anyone who might need to read this today. Shine the light lovely, we’re all in this together.

Love and Light,

t